Climate Shock
Climate Shock
Dr. Stephanie Mines
I have grown and found my voice in the boundless resilience and creativity that has unfolded from the resolution of early shock in my life. I feel rather like a mental-emotional Aikido dancer, wending my way around daunting obstacles in relationships, career and mission. I surprise myself when i keep growing into spaces I did not know existed.
Yet the quality of shock that inserted itself into my nervous system on the morning when I realized we would soon be out of wood and the power would not be returned for several days to restore heat in freezing weather and when the only road into town was a solid sheet of ice, was different.
It took me back to the despair and hopelessness I felt when there was no way to escape from the death threats directed at me by others. At the same time another dimension was added; a dimension beyond betrayal and violence, I felt that I could not rely on my own body to support me. There was nowhere to run; nothing to defend myself from; nothing to strike at in rage. There was nothing to push against. There was nothing.
Thanks to the kindness of a nearby farmer who had a road plow, we got out. A hot bath took me down to the weakness and vulnerability hiding behind the armor of constriction that had formed in my musculoskeletal-structure. I almost passed out when I got out of the tub. My gelatinous knees weaved from under me disallowing any action. I unraveled. But I did not bounce back the next day as I am used to doing. The dull weight of an unstoppable imminent threat stayed in me even though I was safe. I viewed the snow packed streets with their blackened edges, now starting to become mountains of slush in the warming temperatures, as further threats; as gateways to more disaster. This proved to be true in many regards. I was intact to all appearances; but inside I was different. Softened. Humbled. Knocked off a pedestal I did not know I had been standing on like a statue of myself.
Clean clothes and combed hair, sweet smelling lubricants on my weary muscles helped to lessen the impact but did not shift the emotional dismay, confusion and disorientation, all signs of shock. To be clear: shock separates us from our resources. It is not that those resources are suddenly useless or ineffective; they just don’t cut through the grease. They do, nonetheless,make it easier to progress, much more slowly then we would like, towards buoyancy.
This is the truth; minus the cheerleading instinct which I am coming to find toxic. I had encountered something ugly and it was sticking to me. That ugliness was and is climate shock.There was no way out; but just as I thought there was no way out given my ice road, I had to rely on the kindness of strangers or the unknown. I could not fix this condition regardless of all I knew about the nervous system or neurophysiology.
I had to be with it. There was no place to escape to; no where to hide. It’s like the garbage. When we take it “out” where does it go? I became that stagnant, contaminating landfill and it was inescapable.
I have been the cheerleader of potential; the one who always finds another layer of hope. This time, though, I had to find the hope in the hopelessness. That potential could not be named; it could not even be seen or heard. It was in the silent vast grey sky and dirty snow that erased parking spots, narrowed roads in town and fed the wild farmland and ancient trees where I live.
What came to me in the waiting was looking down and listening. Going lower rather than higher by which I mean orienting towards the margins, what I had not taken into consideration. This is not the same as waiting for a miracle. This is not the same as just slowing down. It is looking towards the quiet people who do not proclaim; the ones who persevere and also that which perseveres. It is giving up and staying present at the same time. It is the second part of that last sentence that I have now landed on as the place where I can apply my energy medicine resources. Staying present at the same time as giving up. Bowing to the hopelessness rather than fearing it; letting it in.
Please reach out to me for access to somatic applications that lead in the direction of maintaining presence in the state of hopelessness as we accept the magnitude of climate shock that we have created. From this place of staying present the most grounded solutions, I posit, become evident. These are much simpler than what we were straining to find. Yes, it is listening to the natural world but it is also listening to the margins, the sights and sounds outside your normal range.
This does not have to take a long time; it can happen quickly, even suddenly. But it does require not running away, especially to cheerleading or trying to get better or trying to come out of the hopelessness. It is standing still with eyes wide open; dancing in place, being with what is.
Stephanie Mines, Ph.D.
Founder: The TARA Approach for the Resolution of Shock and Trauma
Vision Holder: CLIMATE CHANGE & CONSCIOUSNESS